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Tips for Your Donor Search

2/20/2020

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Once you decide to use an egg donor to help create your family, the search for the right donor begins.  We know this part of the journey can feel both exciting and daunting, mixed with tons of other emotions.  Our intention is to help scale back the thousands and thousands of available egg donor profiles so you have a select number of prospective candidates to choose from.  This creates a list that is manageable to review and choose from and all profiles you’ll see are a direct reflection of the characteristics you hope to find.  
​
We have been helping intended parents in this process for many years and have some suggestions for parents as they embark on the search.  We hope this helps you in yours!

  • During your search, try to refrain from searching yourself.  It can add to the confusion and sense of overwhelm.  We search over 100 trusted agencies on your behalf. We are thorough, and you can be sure that by enlisting our help, you are doing all your due diligence to find your best egg donor matches available.
  • Think about what you would want in a donor to help you feel that you resonate and feel comfortable with her, almost like you would of a close friend or family member.   You may want someone who resembles the recipient mother, or if you are in a male-male partnership, someone who resembles the non-contributing partner.  Every clients comes into a search looking for different things and our questionnaire helps us to get to the core of what’s most important in your search.  We look at ethnicity, hair color, eye color, height, body type, education, character/personality, interests, athleticism, creativity, and more.  You may also wish to have “must have’s” and “would be nice” for your criteria. Again, our questionnaire will help you fine tune this.
  • If you are in a relationship, talk with your partner about the most important aspects of the donor for you.  You may not both agree, but knowing what qualities are most important to each other can help in the decision-making process.
  • Talk with your clinic and doctor prior to beginning the search for any priorities in criteria they may have for you.  This helps to inform us of any specific medical criteria to include as we search. We know most clinic’s guidelines and will discuss any questions we have before embarking on your search.
  • Schedule a call with your search consultant to understand the structure of the search and to share any other details you may feel are important to look for.  For example, perhaps your dimples are special to you, or the shape of your nose – let us know!
  • As the search unfolds, if and when you see someone who feels potentially right for you, please ask us to inquire about her availability and any hold options the specific agency offers.  We prefer not to wait until the end of the search, as donors can be reserved quickly.  We can often hold someone for a limited period of time while continuing your search.
  • As you proceed in the search, you may come to realize that certain criteria are more or less important than you initially thought.  Reach out to your search consultant to let them know of any changes in your criteria.  The search is ongoing and can be adjusted as you go forward.  No search is a one size fits all and we work collaboratively to help find your best possible matches.
  • Keep in mind your eventual goal, which is to welcome your baby into the world and into your family.  It is easy to get trapped in the many details of the donor’s qualities and to second guess yourself as you review profiles.  I promise you this:  I have yet to hear one parent come back to me and say, “Well, we have our baby, but I wish I had chosen that other donor instead of the one we chose.”  Your child will be perfect for you, exactly yours. 
  • If possible, enjoy the process!  I like to think of your search as a treasure hunt:  She is here, and we are following clues, seeking, and soon, finding the one for you!  We cannot wait to help you find her.
By: Cheryl Lister - Family Match Consulting Search Consultant and proud mother through the miracle of egg donation.  

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How to Find an Egg Donor

4/28/2018

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​One of the first questions future parents ask when deciding to pursue egg donation is, how do I find an egg donor?  While there are emotional and financial hurdles that many recipient clients must overcome before embarking on the egg donation process, thankfully, finding an egg donor is easier than it has ever been.
Years ago, when it was recommended to patients that they pursue egg donation by their fertility doctor, they were handed a list of agencies to contact to assist them in finding their egg donor.  The trouble with that is not every agency is going to have the right egg donor for every client, so the burden of that search is put on them and sifting through countless profiles and connecting with many different agencies can become a full time job.  Additionally, by connecting with a handful of egg donor agencies, it really limits your search when there are over 100 reputable egg donor agencies throughout the country that each have anywhere from 5—500 egg donors!  That’s potentially 50,000 available egg donors to choose from!  While it would be impossible to search through all these profiles on your own, I don’t know any recipient that wouldn’t love to be able to quickly and easily view just the 20-50 top egg donor candidates that most closely match their criteria from that group of 50,000 available egg donors.  Thankfully, that is now a possibility.  
 
Family Match Consulting has relationships with all of the top agencies throughout the country and a unique system to be able to thoroughly and quickly search each agency to find clients the best possible egg donor candidates that match their desired criteria.  One former client called us “the Google search for egg donors”, and essentially that’s what we are!  Clients fill out a search query, or questionnaire, so that we understand the specific characteristics they hope to find in an egg donor and then like Google, we start our search!  We work very quickly, and send each client as many candidates that we find that fit their criteria.  Most of our clients match with their donor within 1-2 weeks and we are able to provide them with tons of profiles that they never would have been able to find on their own.  Aside from the speed, thoroughness, and over a decade of experience we bring to each and every search, we are also proud to offer this service at the very lowest price possible. 
 
We hope to be able to assist you in finding your “perfect” egg donor, too. 
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How to Select an Egg Donor

10/25/2016

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Once you have decided to embark on the egg donation process you are faced with a number of questions, some of which you may have never thought you’d be posed with.  For example, most people don’t grow up wondering “what are the most important characteristics I would hope to find in my egg donor?”  Being faced with this question can be challenging for a lot of our clients, but here are 5 tips that can help you navigate the egg donor selection process. 

  1. Make a list.  Put it all out there.  Ideal hair color, eye color, height, ethnicity, educational background, talents, ideal health history, interests, location, blood type, and anything else you can think of.  We provide all our clients with an extensive questionnaire that goes over all these things and more. 
  2. Decide after reviewing your list, which characteristics would be nice to find and which characteristics are absolute deal breakers.  Think hard about each item and remember the narrower your search criteria, the less options you will ultimately have. 
  3. Have an open mind.  So many clients I’ve worked with over the years have come to me with a list of requirements but oddly enough end up selecting an egg donor that is quite different than what they initially thought they were looking for.  For example, a client may begin their search hoping to find a 5’7” or taller blonde hair, blue eyed egg donor who has a Master’s Degree and ends up selecting a donor who is 5’5” with light brown hair and green eyes with a Bachelor’s Degree.  Each and every person is unique and each and every egg donor is unique.  While she might be an inch shorter than “ideal” or her GPA might be slightly less than what you had hoped to find, she may have other positive distinguishing characteristics like a talent for music or sports that could make her an ideal egg donor for you.
  4. Once you have a group of egg donors that you like and that fit most of the characteristics you hope to find, it can be challenging to make the final decision.  Instead of comparing each trait to one another; for example, ranking each egg donor in order of SAT scores, height, athletic ability etc, it is best to ask yourself one simple question.  Would this donor sit around a family gathering of mine and look and seem as though she fits in?  I think that this is a really beautiful way of selecting an egg donor because ultimately that’s what this process is all about - - family. 
  5. Last and most importantly, it is important to remember that there is no such thing as a perfect person, so there is certainly no such thing as a perfect egg donor.  But the good news is there IS a perfect egg donor for you!  That’s a young lady that you feel comfortable with, who most importantly is available and willing to go through the egg donation process to help you achieve your dream of a family.  
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FREE Egg Donor Search for One Member of PVED!

3/18/2015

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PVED
Parents Via Egg Donation (known as PVED) is a  fabulous non-profit organization that offers support and resources for all people seeking information about egg donation.  Founded by Marna Gatlin, PVED was the first, and remains the largest support group for parents and parents-to-be who are considering egg donation to build their family.  

We hope that anyone and everyone exploring egg donation will enlist the help of PVED.  They offer a ton of free information and resources and have message boards where thousands of people connect to share information and encouragement. 

Visit Parents Via Egg Donation at: www.pved.org 

Family Match Consulting is giving away one FREE egg donor search, with add on follow up option to a member of PVED.  Package is a $1,350 value! 

To enter, please answer the following questions and email responses to:  support@familymatchconsulting.com by APRIL 15th, 2015.  Winner will be contacted that day.

Please be sure to include:
1.  Name of fertility doctor and fertility clinic
2.  Brief explanation of your fertility journey thus far
3.  Characteristics you seek in a donor.  Please include ethnicity, location, physical characteristics, education, and any other important information.  (Don't worry, if selected we will review this in detail and assist with any fine-tuning before we start our search.)
4.  Desired time frame for cycle
5.  Phone number and if it is OK to leave a message at that number

To Qualify, you MUST:
1.  Have a fertility clinic selected
2.  Be prepared to cycle at this time (within approximately 30-90 days) of your donor search

Please Note:
1.  The $1,350 search fee will be completely waived.  Winner  will be required to sign program agreement prior to the search commencing. 
2.  While Family Match Consulting's fee will be waived, winner will still be responsible for all other fees and expenses associated with the egg donation process including but not limited to agency fee, donor compensation, IVF fees, legal fees, etc.
3.  Winner is under no obligation to select an egg donor that is presented to them.
4.  All services and contest submissions are strictly confidential. 

Love and baby dust to all!!!  <3

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Selecting an Egg Donor

3/18/2015

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Egg Donor Search
Finding the right donor, the one that allows you to stop your search and just KNOW you are making the right choice is a huge challenge for anyone.  How do you know you are making the right decision?  What should you be looking for?   Our Founder has over 10 years of experience in matching recipient parents with egg donors and she shares some of her tips here.

1.  Health -  Certainly this is one of the top priorities to consider when selecting an egg donor.  While most agencies will not approve egg donors with serious health conditions, every person has some family history of illness.  You want to make sure that a donor's health history is compatible with your family's history.  For example, if the intended father or sperm donor has a history of heart disease in the family, that may be something you want to avoid when selecting your egg donor.  Keep in mind that finding a donor with all grandparents alive and well without any medical conditions is extraordinarily rare, so create a list of "deal breakers" and outside of that, try and have an open mind.  During your intake with Family Match Consulting, we will discuss your family health history and make sure we are only seeking donors with a background that makes you feel completely comfortable. 

2.  Physical Characteristics -  Our clients typically  want to find an egg donor with similar characteristics to the recipient mother, or someone who looks like they would fit into their family.  Hair color, eye color, height, ethnicity, etc. are some of the things to consider when reviewing profiles.  We will help you fine tune your wish list so we are only presenting you with the profiles of the donors that most closely fit the criteria you seek. It is important not to place too much importance on each individual characteristic though.  For example, if you are seeking a donor that is 5'7", but find a fabulous candidate with so many qualities you seek, but she happens to be 5'5", I don't recommend ruling her out.  We've seen many clients discount a donor for similar reasons but later realize she's a great fit but by then she's already been selected by another recipient. 

3.  Education - For many clients, finding a donor with a strong academic background is important.  We've worked with clients where both parents have attended Ivy League Universities so it is important for the donor to be attending or have graduated from the same.  While we can certainly do a search for this, the results will be limiting.  There are thousands of wonderful egg donors that have graduated from top universities, some with honors. There are also incredibly bright donors without the means or opportunities to attend some of the top schools, so they are pursuing an Associate's Degree from their local college with hopes of transferring to a four year university afterwards.  Some donors skipped school entirely but launched successful careers as entrepreneurs.  These are all things to consider when narrowing down candidates. 

4.  Location -  Most donors are very willing and able to travel for a cycle, though some do have travel restrictions and therefore can only complete cycles near their hometown.  Selecting a donor that lives out of the area, or out of state from your fertility clinic does increase the cost of the process, but it also opens up your search.  For clients in major cities like Los Angeles, or Chicago, finding a local donor with the qualities you seek will be much easier.  However for clients in more remote areas, we recommend opening up your search which will give you far more choices.   

5.  A gut feeling - While you may be seeking a donor that is Caucasian, brown haired, blue eyed, tall, college educated, athletic, with a healthy family history...at the end of the day, it really comes down to whether or not there is a "connection" that you feel when reading the donor's profile.  I always tell clients that one final question you can ask yourself about a candidate is "would this donor
sit around a family gathering of yours and look and seem as though she fits in?"  Sometimes that answer will provide a lot of clarity. 

While finding an egg donor is a challenge, enlisting the help of a search service can help take some of the stress away.  Our experienced consultants will walk each client through the selection process and then search close to 100 agency databases to only provide you with the profiles of donors that fit the criteria you seek.

We wish everyone pursuing their dream of a family - weather it be through IVF, egg donation, surrogacy, adoption, and all things in between, all the very best of luck.

With love and copious amounts of baby dust,

The FMC team


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